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Kink things up a bit with an animal-themed dildo.

Some people like to make controversy where none exists, which is certainly true for sex toys based on animal parts. Yes, I am talking cock here, horse cock, dog cock, whale cock, you get the idea.

The critical distinction about animal dildos is that they are just dildos. It isn't like you are going bottom-up to a werewolf or a dragon, but you could be, I suppose, in your imagination.




These are fantasy dildos that break some of society's taboos, and they have some incredible features for you to enjoy to tempt you to try them.

Don't get me wrong; regular dick-shaped dildos are a lot of fun. They are ideal for exploration or just getting some of what you enjoy when the real thing isn't available. But they can be a little plain.




Apart from length, colour and girth, differences between human form dildos are pretty minimal. They pretty much all look and feel the same. Yes, you have cut or uncut versions but let's face it, a cock is a cock.

Fantasy dildos are becoming more and more popular as a result of people wanting more.

More texture, more variety and more kink.

Within the fantasy category of dildos, we can find all manner of animal-themed dildos that will stretch more than just your imagination.

Why animals? It's a bit naughty, I guess, but more importantly, they have some impressive features you won't find on any human for dildo.

Now take the Comanche War Horse as an example.

Painstakingly modelled on the images and painting of the 1800's warhorse "Comanche". It is striking in its realism and details.

It features some pretty fantastic features, the huge bulbous glans that take some stuffing. Once inside, it almost draws the rest of the dildo in behind it. But the fun doesn't stop there. Halfway down the shaft is a generously proportioned medial ring that gives you another challenge.

He is also a big boy, huge in fact, and that is a trait shared by all John Thomas Toys dildos, stretchers and plugs. The small sizes are lots of fun for most people, but if you like a challenge, check out the available eye-watering sizes on offer.

On the subject of equine delights, the Donkey Dong is also another classic animal-themed dildo, and this one also features a bulbous glans and medial ring too. But it is longer, much longer, so that it can be used for extreme anal depth training. He will give you one hell of a ride.




Animal dildos don't just include horse or donkey delights; think of how kinky the Japanese can be and their love of tentacle porn. Yes, tentacle porn.




Well, you too could be riding and squirming your way to pleasures yet unknown with the Original Tentacle Dildo. There is something about this one that rocks my boat. The ridges and suckers on it are a texture queens dream come true. Lube him up and let him pleasure your holes as they have never been pleasured before. Be a part of your own hentai fantasy and experience the touch of the octopus first hand.

There seems to be a theme here: amazing features and textures just not available on a regular dildo.

Next, I want to draw your attention to the OGLIN



a cross between an Ogre and a Goblin. This gargantuan cock has some imposing ridges and textures that will make your toes curl as you accept the challenge of trying to take it all.

Thrusting with this one feels like multiple cocks are ramming inside you one after the other; it's just another example of extreme textures and fantasy designs adding to the fun.

Now, if horses, donkeys, ogres and tentacles don't pique your curiosity for animal dildos, then imagine a snake working its way up inside you. Maybe that is the stuff of nightmares, or perhaps it is another texture lovers fantasy come true.




The Snake is a beautiful bendy delight. The head is a scan of a real snakes head that was then modelled onto a body with some of the most interesting and beautiful textures you will find on a dildo.

The shape and the drag caused by all the scale details make for a slippery ride that teases and pleases. Image him squirming his way deeper and deeper, making you bite your lips are you try to take it all.

When shopping for fantasy dildos, or any other dildos for that matter, you need to focus on materials and quality, and John Thomas Toys have got both of those covered.

They manufacture their animal and fantasy dildos using copper molds. This is a much more expensive way of making dildos, but it ensures that each one out of a mold is perfect and the same as the first. Quality matters, which is why they have a lifetime warranty on their silicone dildos; not many other manufacturers can match that.

They also only ever use 100% body-safe platinum cure silicone. This means no phthalates that can leach out of your toy. No latex allergy problems, and it also ensures the surface of the dildo is non-porous. This makes cleaning quick and easy.

You get a vac-u-lock compatible suction cup adaptor and a quality storage bag too.




So to summarise, there is nothing wrong with experimenting with an animal dildo. It can really provide you with some fantastic new sensations and opportunities to let your hair down.

Don't be vanilla; kink things up a bit and see why animal dildos are becoming so popular these days. This writer is hooked on them for all the right reasons.






Check out the range available at John Thomas Toys and chose a size that will give you a most enjoyable challenge.

Get your kink on.


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Why would you want to use a male masturbator?


Okay, so some people may think why bother using a male masturbator? When the five "knuckle shuffle" has always worked so well in the past. Plus it has the added benefit of having it always available ;-)


The simple answer is, sometimes you need or fancy something different. Yes, using your hand may work well, but wouldn't the feeling of sinking into a tight wet hole, one that can have a vacuum (adjustable to your preference) be a lot more enjoyable?


That leads you onto the vast choice of male masturbators available. With so many to choose from, it pays to think about your choice first.



Before you part with your hard-earned cash on something to slip inside, think about the materials for just a minute?


As with everything that I sink my "happy chap" into, I think about the material choices. Yes, a cheap sleeve doesn't cost much, but when the materials need to be regularly replaced, the cost can mount up. Not to mention, I want to keep my cock happy and healthy, so I prefer to go with silicone.


You really want to avoid male masturbators that are made from PVC, TPE, TPR (thermoplastic elastomer/ rubber), any Skyn products, rubber/latex, jellies or UR3.

This is because all these materials are known to be porous, and that is most definitely bad.





The porous materials collect bacteria and make it extremely unlikely that you can thoroughly sanitize the inside of your male masturbator. The bacteria will penetrate the material, making it impossible to clean effectively.


I always prefer silicone for any sex toy. Not only is it non-porous, latex and phthalate free, but it is also body-safe. You can incorporate temperature play with silicone too. I like to warm my masturbator in warm water before I play as it feels much more realistic when I do so.


So not only do I want a safe material, but I also want something that is going to look and feel amazing too.


Which leads me nicely onto the fantastic range of masturbators from John Thomas Toys.


They offer a range of traditional looking masturbators and also a few for the more adventurous of you out there. Choose from a virginal pussy, or kink it up by slipping into Godzillaz's, the choice is yours.





Made from platinum grade silicone, they are all body-safe, each design features its own internal textures too providing lots of choices. You can see the inside structure of every bump, ridge and nodule on each product's page on the John Thomas Toys website.


Each one is designed to give you different sensations to enjoy. Just don't forget you'll need some good water-based lube for a play session.


Water-based lube is much better for use with silicone products. I find that some other types of lube can cause me to either lose some of the sensations or leave me with dry spots.


Each male masturbator from the John Thomas Toys range also comes with a screw-in plug, and this is genius. You can use these plugs to control how much vacuum you want to enjoy. Simply lube up, sink your hard cock in, then fit the plug. As you pull out when stroking you get to enjoy a delicious suction effect which compliments the internal textures nicely.


I like the fact that John Thomas Toys don't use hard cases for their masturbators. It means that I can squeeze the masturbator as I stroke with it to increase the tightness when I am ready to cum.





The John Thomas Toys masturbators are sized well for wrapping your hand around to get the most enjoyment out of it or them if you are a proud owner of more than one.


Watch your cock slide into those pussy lips then lay back and enjoy the feeling of the wet tightness wrapped around your cock as you enjoy the sensations they induce when stroking with it.


Cleaning is simple, you just need to soak it in warm soapy water, then run warm water through the centre to make sure you have removed all unwanted fluids.


Ensure that it is thoroughly dry before placing it back into the faux velvet storage bag that John Thomas Toys also provide. These bags are made from good quality faux black velvet and are branded with white JTT branding and logo. They are a great way to keep your masturbator clean and out of sight.





John Thomas Toys stand by the quality of their products by providing a lifetime warranty (terms and conditions apply). They use copper molds in manufacturing too, which produces a higher quality product but costs much more to produce. Copper moulds ensure that every product will have precisely the same bumps, ridges and nodules as the one before.


Yes, silicone masturbators may cost more, but they will also last much longer than other materials. They will also be safer for your best friend, so why not give him a treat and enjoy slipping into something very comfortable. Looked after properly silicone masturbators will last you for years.


Providing pleasure for a long time to "Cum".


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Lube is an often overlooked sex accessory that is capable of taking your masturbatory or sex sessions to new levels of enjoyment.

I am speaking from experience here as I go through a lot of the stuff, some good, some excellent and of course some I wouldn't touch again.

This post will explain why lube is perfect for all genders. Lube makes everything much more enjoyable so let me tell you why.

Why use lube?

Lube reduces friction, and this can be important for mucous membranes, especially when tackling larger sex toys or even fisting.

Reducing friction will help to prevent damage to the tissue in the form of micro-abrasions and lead to a much more pleasant masturbatory or sexual experience.

Lubes makes vaginal sex better in so many ways, and it is great for wanking too. Add a couple of drops to your fingers and let them tease and smooth it over your sensitive areas to see what I mean.

It is essential when enjoying anal sex as that area doesn't produce its own lubrication, and the tissue is very delicate. Just the mention of the words "Dry Anal Sex" makes me cringe. Lube makes insertion more comfortable, and it also means you can enjoy longer play sessions before getting sore.

Now I am going to make some suggestions for lubes that are perfect for several different play types.

Vaginal Play

Firstly let's talk about vaginal sex and masturbation. One lube that has a cult following amongst devotees of fisting fun is J-Lube . It's supplied as a powder, you just add water to form a delightfully slippery lube that is free from glycerine, fragrance and parabens.

It's perfect for general masturbation but comes into its own with giant dildos, fisting and even anal play too. It is incredibly versatile and also very cost-effective. One bottle of the powder is enough to make up 11 litres of lube. So, bring on those giant John Thomas Toys dildos and plugs.

If you don't fancy making up your own lube, then it's also available in the form of J-Jelly , a pre-mixed bottle that contains 240 ml of the delightfully slippery lube. These bottles are great to keep in a play bag ready for immediate use for those moments when you have the horn and just have to get stuck in right away.




Anal Play

As everyone has an anus, we can all enjoy some quality anal lube when playing. The difference between good and bad anal lube is like night and day, though. Luckily John Thomas Toys stock some of the best ones out there, and they all come highly recommended.

Take Bottom Butter for instance, this is a hybrid water and oil-based lube that is long-lasting and great for anal play. As well as having a fun name, this lube will ensure your anal play sessions are just as fun. The only downside is that this one isn't condom safe or suitable for use with silicone toys. But for fingers and fists it's a winner.




If you need a condom friendly anal lube, then try Fist It Numbing which is supplied in a 1-litre bottle, great for extended play sessions. This one is specially formulated to desensitise and is latex condom friendly too.


I have to mention another cult favourite, and it isn't even a lube at all. However, it does often get used as one. If you are looking for something different but effective, then check out Crisco All Vegetable Shortening.




It's a fat-based bakery product that is good in the kitchen and also in and around your back doors. This long-lasting and versatile product is perfect for fisting and anal play where its smooth, slippery nature will be undoubtedly welcomed.

I can't see this use for it appearing on The Great British Bake Off, but it would undoubtedly see ratings soar if it did.

Cum Play

Lube feels good, but if like me you have a bit of a cum fixation then you are going to love Tom Of Finland "Seaman Lube". This water-based lube looks, feels and smells just like its namesake - cum. The texture of it feels incredible, and when it leaks out of you, it feels just like the real thing.



Ideal for use in dildos with cum tubes like the incredible Sampson Dildo, it's just the lube to choose when you want to enjoy some sticky creampie fun and games.


Fill your syringe with Seaman Lube to apply it exactly where you need it when playing, before relishing the feeling of pumping yourself full of it at the point of orgasm.

Jacking or Jilling Off

Lube is great for jacking or jilling off. It doesn't matter if you are using your hand or a sex toy, add some lube to make what you are doing feel even better.

I always use lube and go through bottles and bottles of the stuff. Why? Because it just makes everything better. Why stay dry when you can lube up and glide.


Article by Joanne's Reviews visit her at www.sexmachinereviews.co.uk

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